Every little child I've known has at some point or another been afraid of the sounds that come with darkness...they just seem so much louder and so much more dangerous. In the daylight, you know that sound comes from a tree branch brushing against the window and this sound is just the furnace fan kicking in. But at night, the window sound is definitely someone breaking in and the furnace sound is definitely a monster's heavy breathing...

We have our own reasons for being afraid of night sounds. The creak of a floorboard or opening door too often meant imminent pain and torment, or only slightly better: a panicked scurry into the black void that existed only in our minds. The whispered "Are you awake?" which could have meant to some giving an affirmative answer that a comforting back rub or bedtime story would be forthcoming, instead meant to us that is was imperative we fail to acknowledge the voice regardless of our state of consciousness or fear because the slightest sound or movement from us was sure to be interpreted as our consent to whatever horror was to follow.

Night sounds...through so much of our lives, have been our enemies--preceding 'nightmares' we dare not talk about. But there are other night sounds...the rhythm of a loving partner's breath as they sleep peacefully beside us...the bubble of the fish tank that reminds us that we are every bit as much in control over our own 'now environment' as we are over the fish's miniature world...the cat's contented purr...the ticking clock--every tick one more second away from what was and toward what will be...

There is no choice about night sounds--they have always been and they will always be--but we can choose which we will embrace...and which we will believe.

Copyright 1998, may not be re-printed without express permission.

Sage

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